Cuore {Ruby}

Red did not dream for the first time in months. Normally, nightmares plagued her, memories when control had been not even a concept in her mind. They came back in flashes, memories of slaughtering innocents, men, women, children, it mattered little to a monster, and a monster is what she had been. She reminded herself consistently that she wasn't that feral beast anymore, but it did nothing for the guilt, nothing for the pain of knowing she had destroyed so many lives. But when she was with Dorian, and his familiar warmth was wrapped around her, she didn't dream. She saw no visions of horror in her mind, no blood stained snow... just utter blackness and she loved it.

When that warmth vanished however, she awoke quickly, not fast enough to catch him before he left, but fast enough that she still felt the warmth where he had been. She was loathe to leave the silky confines of his bed. The sheets fell magnificent against her bare skin and she could have laid there forever... but her lover was gone and the sheets grew chilled, and suddenly she yearned to find him. She had been alone for months, and while that had mainly been her own fault, she missed company of any kind, Dorian's was just special. Forcing her lax muscles to move she winced only slightly at the burn between her legs, it was not near enough for her to not have him again, and as long as that held true, she couldn't really bring herself to care.

Vanishing from the sheets she glanced at the scattered clothing and with a gentle smile, choose his white linen shirt. It dwarfed her, reaching a third of the way to her knee, she was forced to roll the sleeves partially up her arms and she buttoned a few of the buttons towards the bottom, she left the top of it open... she doubted she would be wearing it long. She had never taken his clothes before, at least not without cause. She wore it now because it smelled of him and that thought made her smile. Her hair fell in messy curls, scattered about her lower back, bouncing gently as she walked, she did not need to call him name, she simply followed his scent. She smiled as he called for her, trotting just a bit faster at the call, he had stayed... waited for her... he had never done that before.

She appeared in the doorway of his study, her attention honing in quickly on her lover, the painting did not so much as cross her mind. Her eyes drifted to the tray of tea and she smiled for him, that gentle sweet smile that she only ever gave to him. It was Dorian's smile. She trailed forward, grabbing the glass he had left for her, but not bringing it to her mouth. She reached him, tracing his cheekbone with her thumb before placing the sweetest of kisses upon his mouth, thanking him silently for thinking of her. She folded her legs beneath her and sat beside him, resting her cheek against his shoulder and sipping her tea slowly before setting it back on the tray and burrowing into his side.

"Good morning Dori." Her voice was heavy still laden with sleep, she was not accustomed to sleeping so soundly and a part of her wished to return too it, but his compliments had her cheeks coloring prettily, she was not accustomed to such sweet words spoken outside of a realm of pleasure, she was much more accustomed to insult and she found herself strangely quieted. She was at a loss for how to respond. "Thank you... you are not so bad looking yourself." She shifted, let her legs stretch out beside her and leaned against his body, craving his warmth... perhaps she should have grabbed something a bit more warm, spring was not quite upon them yet. But his words surprised her, caught her off guard... talk? Since when did he ever wish to engage her in something that did not involve any sort of flat surface?

"Talk with you? What would you like to speak of?" She curled one arm around his stomach as she spoke, she had not meant it to be a sexual gesture, she had merely wished to hold him. Even when she didn't want him physically, she still craved his scent and his attention, and it seemed for the present she had both.

The warmth of his body against her own, even through the thin layer of clothes felt divine, he always felt amazing pressed against her, but being with him just sitting, talking, like a normal, human interaction... it was blissful, her body held no tension, she was utterly lax against him, she was in no rush to go anywhere or do much of anything. He could read silently, read to her, sing to her, or speak nothing at all and she would be perfectly content. She had never had a family, aside from the widow who had taken her in, the woman she affectionately referred to as Granny. She had never been given much affection or love and even if he did not love her, even if he would never be hers, this gesture, no matter how simple it seemed did wonders for her. She realized then that she was not but his slave, he could ask of her anything. To kill an army of thousands, to drag her back to bed, to keep her here, locked away in his study and she would do it. She hated and loved the power he had over her, but for now she was content to merely lay beside him and a smile curled her mouth as he drew her closer and played with her hair. She squeezed him gently laughing softly into his shoulder.

He surprised her once more as he draped the blanket over her legs before returning to her and she caught her bottom lip between her teeth, a habit she had most assuredly picked up from him. What had come over him? Such kindness, such concern, such passion for her well being and not just her body... it seemed so unorthodox, so utterly unlike him. She worried for a moment that he needed to tell her something dreadful, a new twist to his curse, a new element that she had not yet to discover, but she remained silent, let him gather his wits and answer her in his own time. She hummed against his shoulder, her laughter soft and quiet at his own jest at his curse, she could not find the strength to scarcely move much less expect her brain to drum up a quick witted response. For once, she didn't wish for this to turn into a quick lust filled morning. She was curious as to why he had gone to so much trouble for her.

"Offer me something?" She lifted her head enough to see his face, echoing his words. Her head tilting adorably to the left as she was left puzzled by such a statement. She frowned, brows coming together as she thought of what he could possibly offer her. His wealth was practically endless, jewels, gowns, opulent gems, were naught but trinkets to him, not that she even wanted any of the above... a horse? She had one, a gorgeous stallion, and she had no need for a herd. Her face relaxed and she pressed the lightest of kisses to his still clothed shoulder before easing back against it.

"I need nothing, silly, having you here is enough."

Red knew she should not have stayed the night. She had written to Granny several nights ago that she was on her way home, and she should have been back a few days prior, she had had every intention of heading straight to the Inn, maybe take a few days to adjust living amongst people once again, before she really announced her presence, the old woman, she knew, would be beginning to worry. She was never afraid that Red could not look after herself, she was afraid of what those who hated her might do too her. It would not be the first time she had been captured. Her body tensed briefly as she thought of that and swiftly pushed the thoughts away from her mind, forced them back into the dark recesses of her mind, she swore to never think about them again. Not even Granny knew the extent of the damage they had caused her. It was the singular memory Reds psyche could not handle.

His fingers moved from her hair to her shoulder, stroking it almost absently and the sensation quickly brought her back to the present. She enjoyed his attention, released her disturbing thoughts and simply focused on him. The feel of his chest effortlessly rising and falling, the warmth seeping through the thin material of his shoulder and into her cheeks, his fingers playing about her body... Granny could wait. The old woman would understand. He remained silent, contemplative, thinking through his thoughts and Red let him. She knew enough about him to know that words beyond charm did not come so quickly to him, but then he was speaking and she listened.

She understood his words and silently she appreciated such honesty. She had learned the extent of his curse the last time she was here and it had nearly killed her, her own emotions had driven away, far away, and other than healing somewhere peaceful and quiet she really hadn't resided here and yet... he wanted her too. She knew he would never be content with a singular person, Dorian Gray, the one that was currently curled up with her good, but the damnable painting would steal him from her, she knew that. This Dorian was fleeting... but that did not mean he would not return, but could she handle his other lovers? Could she bring herself to see him with other people? She didn't know. The curse made jealously and rage so much more difficult for her to control. Only as her thoughts drifted to the wolf did she realize she had been utterly silent for a good long while. He was waiting for something, any kind of reaction and she let out a long breath hiding her face in his arm, as she gathered up the nerve to respond. She didn't look at him, but she allowed his scent to calm her and the gentle kiss he had placed upon her head to soothe her tattered nerves.

"While I appreciate the home of grandeur and the finery, it tis not why I have ever come here. I hate the thought of you with someone else, but I understand that I can never be your everything." She worried her bottom lip, pausing silently speaking with the beast that reigned her soul and debating her next words carefully. The last had hurt her, the knowledge that such was true wounded her more than she cared to admit and she knew she could not face him if she wished to get her next words out. "But, if living here would make you happy I will do so gladly, because I love you." It was the first time she had spoken as such since she had returned, and while he more than likely knew, it felt oddly freeing to speak the words once more. She still hid in his arm, still childishly afraid to look at him, but she felt better as if nothing could touch her so long as he remained beside her.

She hid her face away from him his words, his honesty, they touched her, even if she was struggling to believe him, every action every word he spoke now was further proof that he was trying. He had stayed here, waited for her, made her tea, was lounging with her in his most sacred of rooms, completely at ease and relaxed, he wanted her to stay with him, he wanted her here. She had never seen him want anyone more than once...except for her. How could she tell him no when he was struggling so hard to make her see, to make her understand that he was trying to be better, that he wanted to feel things aside from carnal pleasure more often? She could not abandon him, nor did she want too, and despite her own worried musings she realized he was at a loss. He didn't want for her to be unhappy, but he wanted her presence here. She wondered cynically which one of them was more out of their element here. Her or him?

"Hush." She lifted her head to rest her chin on his shoulder so she might see him. Her fingers coiled around the underside of his chin and turned his head so she could look into familiar twin pools of black, and she smiled for him, that gentle, innocent smile that she had deemed his. "I will stay. So long as you will have me. I love you, I want to help you, if I can... just do me a favor, if you must indulge in someone else, tell one of your servants? The smell of cheap perfume or cologne is quite taxing on my nose." She bit her lip to quiet her laughter as she teased him gently.

It was...nice. Even with the serious note their conversation had taken just to sit here with him like this. No obligations, no hidden agendas, he wasn't faking conversation to get her to leave, she wasn't pretending to buy it... It was a blissful feeling, it seemed so normal, she wondered if this was how normal families interacted with one another? She supposed she would never know because her and Dorian would never be normal. He could try and so could she but at the end of the day, she was still a wolf, and he was still cursed. Relapses were almost guaranteed. She could not escape her fate no sooner than he could escape his.

"You do remember that I can change into a several hundred pound creature at will yes? You are not the only one that will need to work on control." She chuckled lightly, if he could make light of his own demons than so could she. She smiled mischievously green eyes glittering with secrets. "There is a place I wish to show you, but it will be a few days journey, and we must arrive when the moon is full, it tis a few weeks away... will you come?"

"I do believe I have silenced you on more than one occasion, at least if we don't count moans of pleasure." She laughed softly at his gentle joke and shook her head, rough curls fluttering around her face. She liked this, sitting here, laughing, joking with him. She wondered briefly what had driven him to give such things up, but she would not ask. He did not pry into her past and she returned the favor, a bit of an unspoken agreement. There were things she never wished for him to know, there were things she did not wish to think about ever again, and if, at all, she could help it, she would never speak of. She was certain the same held true for her lover and this was, quite possibly the reason they got along so well. Darkness tainted her past and his, monsters decorated their lives now. To some degree they understood one another, and quite possibly it was what initially had ensnared her too him... either that or the fact that once the doors were closed and the curtains drawn, he could be just as wild and untamed as she. There was no denying that this... whatever this was had started on sexual energy.

"I can't decide if you hate me or love me for introducing you to feelings. If I may have a defense, the first time I saw you, my intention was not to make you feel anything but pleasure... but you called to me, both sides of me. After I had you, I couldn't let you go. I had to come back, you became an addiction to me, and then something more. I was terrified of my own feelings at first. I have told you how my first love ended, the second man who touched me, I had feelings for but not of such depth..." She tensed here, horribly so. "I don't speak of him ever." Her voice was cold, hard, and a shiver rippled down her spine as she obviously recalled something unpleasant and she forced herself to relax falling silent once more. "After that, I had affairs on and off but nothing of substance, I assumed it was better that way, no feelings, no emotions, meant no pain, of course than your gorgeous self entered my bar and blew all of that right out of the water. You slayed me with little more than a touch." She was relaxed once more, back to the carefree, gentle tones. She fell silent for a moment, considering her next words thoughtfully.

"You need not apologize, I know you do not mean everything you say. I understand that much, I know that painting sucks more out of you than just your love... but I wouldn't care for you like I do if you were perfect. When I say I love you... I do not mean only certain sides of you. I love you and all of your flaws, even that portrait you keep bound in ropes, I love that side of you too." She smiled into the kiss he offered her, gently returning it, not wanting to break the fragile atmosphere that surrounded them here. She spoke no more of him cheating on her... was he cheating? He had not asked to court her, merely to stay with him. She supposed, for now, she would drum it up simply to that the act wounded her and she wished not to think about it.

"Hmm..." She hummed against his skin, a smile playing about her mouth at his playful question. "In exchange for dragging you away for a few days, I would have to reside here... have your gorgeous self all to myself on multiple occasions, and all of the luxuries of your life style... you drive such a hard bargain love."She leaned up and kissed the very tip of his nose. "Put that way, how can I refuse?"

She had not meant for her playful teasing to cause him strife. he had merely done what she had always done, spoken her mind. She was one of the most forward women in Aledon and that was partially because of her past, she had grown up alone, on a small farm with a woman who was anything but civil and lived by the phrase "Shoot it with the damn crossbow and figure out what it is later." She had been raised in a backwater village with no money, and even poorer personalities... it was only because of Snow that she was as refined and intelligent as she was. Dorian didn't know that Red was Snow's personal confidant and when she needed it, her personal bodyguard. There was no one who Red trusted more than Snow and no one whom Snow trusted over Red. She almost looked forward to Snow's next ball... she yearned to see Dorian's face when she came trailing at the Queens side. That would be the shock of the century for him, she was sure. She still possessed a great many secrets he did not know.

"Am I the only one that brings these feelings, these emotion to you?" She sat up a bit more, giving him more of her attention, genuinely curious, if the portrait was supposed to steal all of his emotions, was she somehow... an exception? Perhaps because in her own way she was a demon, the painting did not register his feelings towards her as true? Could she bend his curse? That intrigued her, his curse she did not think could be broken without his ultimate death, but perhaps it could be bent, molded, a loop hole if you will. "Does anyone or anything else cause these feelings in you? Perhaps your curse does not steal your thoughts away so fast because it sees me as a monster?" She tilted her head to the side contemplating such things.

"Dorian Gray." She chastised him with narrowed eyes and a playful smile, her eyes drifting over to the covered portrait. "I have never said anything that I do not mean. if I thought I could return goodness to your soul, I would uncover your portrait with you watching and kiss my frog back into a Prince... although that usually requires a princess, not a werewolf. I would probably end up making it worse." Despite herself, she laughed as she pictured that monstrous painting blinking up at her dumbfounded as she kissed it. Despite her silly thoughts she really would if she thought it would help him, no matter how vile it may have seemed. "I swear sometimes you fish for the word love to leave my lips, as much as you claim to hate it... your sardonic and hedonistic tendencies mean nothing to me. I have told you before I love you for you, not for your wealth, your manor, or any other material object, even as much as I love your body, I would give it up forever if that would make you happy. That's all I've ever wanted was for you to be happy." She fell silent for a moment. "I wish I could set you free. Give you back an untarnished portion of your soul. I would trade my own for it, I think." She was much more serious, and she brought her other hand up to play with the locks of his hair. She wished for so many things she could never have, but she did not linger on such things, she was happy now... and in the long run, she would have to make that matter.

"I fear I do not wish to ruin your surprise love." She paused and contemplated exactly what hint she would give him, loving the feel of his fingers tracing imaginary patterns across her back. "I will, however tell you that we will not be taking horses. You will be riding me... and not in the excessively fun way." She giggled into his skin unable to resist herself. "I promise you though, that I will be taking you somewhere worthy of your beauty. It will not be a place that soon slips your mind. Technically... I'm not supposed to tell you it exists much less take you there, you will be the only human who knows of its existence." She smiled a bit picturing him in her mysterious location. He would be mesmerized by it as she had, as her ancestors had. Its beauty was unearthly and she wasn't sure why she wished to show him, perhaps because he accepted her, curse and all and no one ever had before, or perhaps she just wanted him all to herself for a few days. "Tell me something about you Dorian, something no one else knows... a story... your favorite color.... your best memory... anything you want." She murmured softly, wondering quietly if he would indulge her at all.

Her curiosities it seemed, sparked something within him, memories, emotions, thoughts, such things he had not seemed too capable of a few months prior, perhaps she was the anomaly, the one exception to his curse, it seemed quite foolish for her to think as such but...he did not seek out his other pleasures a second time and rarely made conversation with them aside from getting them back to his manor and once he had them here, she knew enough about his wily ways to imagine it did not take him long to have them. But she... she had returned, come back for him and he had let her and on occasion had even come for her. She had never disillusioned herself into believing she was his only, but she knew there was something about her that piqued his interest and obviously his fancy and perhaps this was it, he had not realized it before, but now that she had distanced herself from him, let him experience without the abnormality blocking his view, perhaps, now that she returned he truly did understand. She had the ability to make him feel, make him think, he may never love her, but he could feel her love. Her love was the force that was bending his curse. She blushed prettily at his comment shying away from him slightly.

"I am not so special Dori. I just love you and I project that emotion onto you. I force you to feel my love, and as such, I believe, I have bent the rules of your curse." She leaned into the palm of his hand and returned his gentle kiss with one of her own a gentle smile ghosting across her mouth. Her smile grew as he described himself and she leaned forward, resting her forehead against his own, her mouth ghosting across his own as her lips pulled up into a full blown smile and her eyes sparkled in amusement. Her body trembling in its effort to stop her quiet laughter. "Thoughtful, when you want to be." A kiss as soft as a butterfly against his forehead. "Kind when it suits you." One upon his cheek. "Sweet, at least to me..." Once upon the other. "And an exquisite lover." She winked at him playfully and kissed him square on the mouth. She pulled back and returned to his shoulder not wanting to tease him too terribly, and the next words that spilled from his mouth made her smile for an entirely different reason. "I would offer much more than just myself if I could save you... and your eloquent tongue."

"I'm afraid... you must wait..." Her eyes drifted to the window, green turned to gold and the barest hint of a lengthened canine protruded from her mouth before they vanished once again. "Two weeks? Luna will not be full into then and we cannot access it until she bathes the earth in light." Her connection to the moon was bizarre and impossible to describe to anyone who was not what she was, and she never tried. She was the guiding force in Red's life and when, left to her own devices, she navigated the earth with no compass or technique other than Luna's guiding light.

She listened to his story, she had not expected something so deep from him. She had not wished it. She had half expected him to tell her some fantastical story of worlds she had not seen, some crazed experience that was not hers, it surprised her that he trusted her enough to tell her such things, and if anything at the end of his story she adored him even more. She would not blame him for his past but she would not pretend to understand his grief. It must have wounded him greatly.

"I wish you could understand how euphoric it feels to love someone, I do not have the words to describe what I feel for you, and I wish I could articulate such things in a more profound way. I did not expect you to share something so powerful with me, and I feel it only fair to offer you the same. So I will tell you the story of how I owe the queen far more than I owe Rumple." She paused here sucking in a large breath. "After I killed Peter, the man I was supposed to marry, I was hunted. The wolf had slaughtered half the town and tore my lover to pieces. Snow tried to help me escape but I could not drag her down with me and I left her. I was alone with a curse I knew nothing about. Unbeknownst to me, I was followed, a man whose name I do not remember befriended me, bewitched me. I developed feelings for him, not love, but I cared for him. I stupidly followed him... they waited until I was asleep to take me. They bound me in thick iron chains, stripped me of everything I owned and tortured me. Blades as thick as my arm plunged into my abdomen, my arms, my legs, hammers crushed bone, flaming pokers burned my flesh... they would injure me, wait for my healing ability to make it vanish and then they would start all over again. Demon, monster, freak, devil's advocate... I don't remember the rest, there were too many. Some of them would come for me while the others slept, take their pleasure from my broken body and leave so known of the others would know." Her voice was deceptively calm, but her body was stiff and her eyes held a distant far off look. "It was Snow that saved my life. I don't know how long they had me, but I remember her crying and apologizing profusely for an evil she had not done. I have saved her life a great many times since then, but I don't think... I don't think I'll ever repay her."

Red had endured far too many disappointments, the woman she had been before the curse had rolled in to sweep them away was false. She smiled, laughed, protected the queen, was there for her like any good friend should be, but she never lived, she hid herself away from the world, kept it caged like the beast that had so long ruled her. When the curse had taken them, however it had swiped her memories and clean, had locked her, frozen in time amongst normal, civilized people. She had learned to live once again, and her memories had returned, she became an odd cross between the two. The carefree human fused with the recluse wolf and somehow, Ruby had been created from the chaos. They were two different personalities that shared the same body, two halves to the same soul.

She did not push him as he trailed off, she let him think without her aid, knowing such moments were rare for him. She let him ponder, let him think and after he begged her to let him have this time she released him from her mouth entirely. She respected that statement far too much, and she was beginning to understand what she could and could not do while he was in such a frame of mind. His poetry spilled from him and her eyes fluttered, her body shivering. "I love the sound of your voice. When you spin your words into wonderful poetry... I wish I could hear it forever."[/b] She let her heart speak, he was attentive and thoughtful and she would return his words in spades. Gently she rested her head against his shoulder, taking solace in his warmth and smiling as he spoke of Luna. The moon was not a physical being, at least to Red's knowledge and with a soft chuckle she spoke.

"Luna has a bond with all of her children, it tis... impossible to describe. She sings to us, the softest of lullabies when we need them, she guides us when we are lost, she whispers to us when we require her guidance. I have never had a family, but I imagine the bond I share with her is the same a mother would have their child. Well... a good mother anyway." She smiled mischieviously here, giggling into his shoulder. "I will indulge in a great many lustful fantasies but I believe incest shall be the one line I do not cross. You need not be jealous."

She had never told anyone such a story before, not even the elder woman who knew more of her secrets than anyone. No one knew her like Dorian now did... why her heart had set itself on him was beyond her. He would make her bleed, he would make her cry, he could and quite possibly would break her without ever inflicting a wound, but she had never felt so strongly towards anyone before and perhaps such powerful feelings were why she molded herself to his living standards, why she would we force herself to turn a blind eye to his activities, why she trusted him so throughly. She allowed him to pull her closer, she was practically in his lap by the time he stopped shifting, she was silent a great long while, drawing strength from him and contemplating how too respond. She had never intended to tell anyone of such horrendous things and she felt bad for dampening his mood, it was so rare he got to think.. she should be filling this space with happy stories and silly things.

"Hey... its not your fault love. What done is done, I can't change the past. It obviously has not made me too terribly skittish." It was a poor joke but she wished for the subject to change... quite desperately. "Besides Im still beautiful enough to lure you with a pretty smile." She winked at him and held up one of her hands for emphasis, she did not scar very easily, not even when that damn troll had snapped her like a twig had she scarred over. She was greatful that her flesh bore no memories of those nights. Her eyes sparkled as she remembered something and just as quickly as blush dusted her cheeks and she looked away suddenly embarrassed. "Which reminds me... I need to tell you something... I would not tell you at all if I did not think you would find it." She giggled softly burying her face in his neck to hide her embarrassment. "Its nothing too terrible, I promise!"

She smiled at his gentle words. She could not understand how poetry came so easily to him. It was a guilty pleasure of hers to hear him speak, she wondered what other talents were hidden beneath his surface. Could he sing as well? Write? Play an instrument? Did he like to dance, or perhaps just to sway in the background? Red knew a vast deal about him physically, but she knew very little of his habits his hobbies, what foods he enjoyed, what social gatherings he attended, and suddenly she wished to know. She wanted to know the man that the painting was determined to suck away from him. If he had ever done such things, did he still or were they forever lost, trapped in oils of paints of the portrait?

"I do not mean to cause you so much strife with my presence or my words. I do not mean to tempt you so... perhaps I should sit elsewhere so you might have your space?" Guilt crept up her spine, a feeling she hated and she swiftly escaped his embrace before he could reply, taking the blanket and seating herself on the floor beside him, perhaps a bit of distance would allow him to keep his mind awhile longer, she always wanted him physically but she wanted him at peace, and she had never seen such expressions of contentment upon his face and she wished to keep it there, as long as the portrait would allow it. She covered herself with the blanket to the best of her ability. The frown fell from her face at his gentle teasing and she shook her head.

"Luna only speaks with me when I need her. She answers only if you call and usually that requires a loud bay, something I cannot make in this form... I wish I could let you feel what I feel when I change. It is painful... but after the change it is euphoric. Rules do not govern your actions, society holds no quarter, the world melts away and nothing but the ground beneath your feet matter. True freedom. It is indescribable." She murmured softly, her gaze drifting to the sun almost absently. Her connection with the earth and the moon was something she valued greatly, she did not think she could survive without her curse. Life would seem so utterly drab in comparison, or so she imagined. She smiled at his compliment, but the blush returned in full as he asked her of what she meant.

"First of all I make a dreadful drunk. It tends to bring out the more wild side of me, and not in the good way... I have a horrible tendency to simply do things." She would not meet his gaze, kept her focus solely on the floor. "There is a very tribal civilization to the East, infamous for its festivals, they are wondrous to be apart of, drinks, dancing the likes of which you have never seen, chants... I chanced upon them during such a thing and I fear they must have gotten me quite drunk, for when I woke next they had bestowed upon me a tattoo of your name." The last part was murmured, barely audible as she shied from him. It wasn't that large, but it was still there and dreadfully embarrassing.

Her heart completely cracked as he reached out for her when she moved away, but she had done for him. To help him keep what little amount of clear thought he was able to procure. Her green eyes were torn and she hesitated greatly but finally scooted closer to him, and leaned against his leg, catching his hand and lacing their fingers before bringing his knuckles to her lips for a gentle kiss. Perhaps she should stop merely doing things, they seemed to get her in worse trouble than remaining still. Restlessness, however, seemed to be in her nature and she sighed.

"Trust me doll... the last thing I ever wish to be is away from you. This might sound a touch odd but your... presence... it soothes the wolf within me, makes it easier for me to control it, plus I really happen to like you despite all of your narcissism... I enjoy my time spent with you. But I have never seen you so at ease or so relaxed, and I am loathe to break you of it." She smiled up at him, pretty green eyes reflecting the honesty in her words. She had always spoken her mind and she would not change for anyone, including him. She breathed in deep focusing as she thought of how to answer his next question. It was...incredibly difficult to describe the change to anyone, even each other, but for him, she would try.

"When you shift, you no longer think like a human. Mortality, life, death... they all blur become a singular driving force. Your entire perspective changes. The forests are not simply dirt and foliage, they become living, breathing things. Their energy, you can feel it with every step you take, a kaleidoscope of sensations beyond the grasp of human concept. Touch, taste, sight, smell, hearing it's all enhanced, sensitive to everything, everyone, you see the world through the eyes of something never bound in chains, society, or anything civilized. Wild, reckless, untamed, everything is permitted, nothing is forbidden. Your heart, your body, your soul, they respond only to the thrumming pulse of the earth, the call of the heavens. If you give in entirely you forfeit humanity for the beast... and the euphoria you feel is so very, very tempting, its why control is so hard for us. Every time I shift I never wish to come back... but I know I must if I do not wish to lose everything I know. Memories, friends, Granny... you." She rested her cheek against his knee, her body shivering as she remembered such things. "I cannot change you, in case you were curious. Our curse is not like the legends, a bite will not infect you." She laughed a bit at that. She loved to hear the ridiculous stories about her kin, they amused her greatly.

"Oh... shut up!" She laughed into his leg, her green eyes sparkled with amusement, glad at least, that he was not angered. " Apparently I spoke of you too much and the only way they could silence me was by shoving a needle into my back! It's not that large!" Her laughter filled his study. "Besides...what is life if you don't take risks? If I never took a chance, I never would have come home with you."

Even the warmth of his leg felt nice to her. She was utterly relaxed and at ease, even on the floor. As a smile child she had spent a vast majority of nights beside Granny like this, toying with her crossbow and listening to the stories she spun, she had been captivated by the words of grandeur and heroism. Until of course she had eaten her lover... then she rather decided she hated them. She had never wanted to be the monster in those tales. She was at peace here, hidden away in Dorian's mansion, his most sacred room. She felt honored, special that he would choose to sit and chat with her over finding something else to bide his time. He was as restless as she when he wanted to be.

"Possessive? I never would have guessed." The coy response came quickly and she eased herself back up beside him, gently resting her head against his shoulder once again. She could deny him nothing. She pressed her lips together, thinking hard on a story she could tell him and finally deciding. "If I am the one that keeps this calm, then I shall tell you a rather silly story and I swear on Luna herself that every word of it is true. I never knew my parents, and my grandmother had no idea what they named me, for the first several years of my life I was affectionately referred to as "kid." Granny knew of my curse and had a red cloak, similar to the one I wear now, enchanted. It kept me from shifting so long as I wore it during a full moon." She paused a moment letting him absorb what she had said. "My Granny, not wanting to tell me that I was a monster like the ones from her stories, lied. She told me that in the ones surrounding our village was a great and terrible wolf, and he could only be repelled by the color red. I wore that cloak daily from the sheer terror that the beast would take me, as silly as it sounds it became my armor and the villagers coined the name Red." She laughed lightly. She could still remember how scared she had been. Granny used to put her to bed, wrapped up in the cloak and sit in the rocking chair, trusty crossbow in hand. She had never realized it was to keep the few who knew what she was from killing her, not protecting her from some massive beast.

Gently she reached forward to grab his hand, coiling her fingers in his and squeezing gently at his faraway look after her explanation of the wolf. She listened to his words considering them thoughtfully. She had considered many times forfeiting her human side for the wolf. She had not yet told him that the more often one shifts, the slower one ages. if you give into the beast entirely immortality is granted, but you lose all notions of ever being human. Of ever feeling anything.

"Do not get me wrong, the forests... they call to me, beckon me, especially when the moon is high and it is torture to resist them, but I do not wish to lose my memories, my feelings, my emotions. I do not wish to give such things up, even for the wolf. I fear what you might do if you had my strength. I have not yet shown you what I can do even in this form... one of these days I'll show you just my speed." She mused quietly. She could remember back in Storybrooke. Dr. Whale... he had wished to kill himself and she had only just made it in time. She cleared the entire dock in little under a few seconds and pulled him from the sea, if had been she who had convinced him to try living once again... she made a mental note to go and check up on him. This wasn't his world either.

"I think... if you would like, I may have something that would allow you to see what I see and feel what I feel when next I shift. If anyone could appreciate freedom more than you, I would be hard pressed to find them. Would you like too?" Red had a plethora of stories, of secrets, she had not shared. This was only one of many. She smiled gently as he made light of her foolish drunkenness. "You may see it whenever you like, it tis your name after all..." She paused and then laughed, the blush still lightly gracing her. "I suppose I'm not helping that possessive side of you am I?"

Red listened to his words, they troubled her deeply. He claimed himself a narcissist, put himself down, and then pleaded with her not to build him back up lest that part of him return. She wished she could have met the man before the portrait was ever created. She wondered what their initial interaction would have been like. Would he have even glanced at her twice? He was an upstanding figure of society, she was a tavern wench, fending off drunken smacks on her backside more often than not. She doubted he would have even offered her a second glance... but then again if it hadn't been for her own curse, she would not be the bold and adventurous soul that she was. She would never have had the courage to approach him. It was odd how their curses seemed to be the driving force to their meeting. She could see the tension in his shoulders as he fell silent, he was fighting with himself and more than likely his own demons. Shifting slowly, as to not startle him, she lifted her free hand to thread it through his hair, gently stroking the mused strands and massaging his scalp. She could be a distraction if he needed one, her eyes drifted to his covered portrait and she caught her bottom lip between her teeth. Please... please just give him this.

"I love you." It was simple, gentle, barely breathed into his skin. She did not wish to promote the painting with compliments, but she wanted him to know she was still here ."You are far more to me that I can say. I like being with you, regardless of what we are doing." She murmured softly, it was the tamest thing she could think of to say. She soothed him as he lost himself in his thought. She stroked his hair, squeezed his hand periodically, anything to let him know that she was still here, that he wasn't fighting his demons alone. She would stay as long as he permitted her. She loved him, terribly so.

"A child of Luna is something you are born as or you are not, it is passed from mother to child. I am the wolf and the wolf is me." Her explanation was short and sweet, but it got the point across and then he was fighting again, and she was powerless to help him, and then... then he was pleading. He looked so desperate, so lost, and she was powerless to say no. The last thing she had dreamed of doing this morning was shifting but this magic... the magic she had, the painting could not touch him, his curse could not touch him. He would be bonded directly to her heartbeat, her life force, only for a day, but he feel her in a way no one ever had or ever would again.

"Come." She released his hair and grabbed his other hand, rising from her spot beside him and gently pulling him from his place on the sofa. She kept her eyes locked on his and led him away from his study, walking backwards. "Come with me, trust me." She led him back to his bedroom, releasing him only long enough to rifle through her skirts only to withdraw a small vile containing a glowing blue liquid. She laced their fingers together once more and trailed down his stairs, and out into his courtyard, gently replacing her hand with the vile.

"This is fairy dust. Once I shift and you are seated on my back, drink it and everything I have told you prior will become your reality. But know this Dorian, once you drink it, you will feel everything I feel, see everything I see... this is not a memory your painting can ever strip from you, this is magic. You will feel my love for you, and you will remember it along with every sensation, every sound, every taste, that I experience. I want you to be sure, that you truly wish to experience all of that." She paid no mind to her indecent state of undress, this was far to huge, far too bonding to be taken lightly and she needed him to understand. "I will understand if that is too much for you Dorian."